Enlightenment is Gently Stepping Aside During the Life’s Shitstorms

I’ve recently come through a really challenging couple of years. When I say challenging I mean that my health, finances, relationships, in short my security on all levels, felt in jeopardy. We all have these periods in our lives, the times that make us wonder about the purpose of it all.

To find my way through, I needed a steadfast mentor and a deliberate course of action that promised hope on the other side. 

I didn’t know if my plan would work…I didn’t know if I would recover my health. I didn’t know if I’d be able to work a normal schedule and earn enough money to support my household. Nor did I know if I ever again be the kind of mother, friend or partner I aspired to be.

I committed fiercely to my own recovery, allowing my own needs to really matter and count at least as much as anything else in my life. 

I took action steps…some were small, some were audacious, some even seemed ludicrous at the time. After my doctors found no physical diagnosis, I sought out a skilled physician on the other side of the country. I changed my schedule to totally accommodate my daily rhythms, and I got outdoors to walk before the sun set every day. I even applied for a mortgage with a lower interest rate despite being turned down several times. If courage is fear plus faith in action, I became courageous.

People recognized my intention and my sincerity was rewarded. I believe that I found my way through the grace of God and the universe. Nothing short of a miracle for me.

It took a shitstorm of losses for me to face the error of my ways.

And here’s my error: I honestly did not know how to stop, relax, celebrate, and connect with my loved ones to stop my own the cycle of single mom burn out.

What I now know is that I am not alone, and we are smack in the middle of an epidemic of female burnout. But that’s a topic for another entry.

So much changed as I began to simplify my life and find joy in the every day rituals and routines of earning a living, caring for a home, and maintaining a healthy body. 

Perhaps the greatest gift from all of this is how I’m now able to step aside when things get crazy, and they always do at some point.

An enlightened mind is able to bear witness to awkwardness, shame, anxiety, conflict, even our own inner critic.

This kind of bearing witness from a solid ground of awareness is the enlightened way of being I’ve always long for.

Awe is important in our lives, yet for radical aliveness, the perfect sunset, the best dinner, or even greatest sex you’ve ever had, are not required for enlightened living.

The ability to have your own back no matter what you’re experiencing—your ability to bear witness to the shitstorms of your life and stay steady….that skill will make your spirit unstoppable.

I’m rooting for you. Have a great Sunday!